Vacuosity

Fire up the BBQ

I very nearly removed my eyebrows today.

I had opened the barbeque, turned the knobs to "ignite", heard the hiss of gas, and punched the auto-light button.

Nothing.

I tried it again, and again. No biggie, I had had this problem before. I just needed to light it manually. The valve on the cannister was making an odd hiss too though, which worried me. I got down to check it, closed the valve, and reopened it, just to be certain.

Unfortunately, I have been more than a little absent-minded lately, and I was distracted a little longer than I should have been. Of course, the gas was open more or less the entire time. So, imagine what happened when I used the lighter.

I actually saw the giant ball of flame in time to close my eyes, but I didn't turn my head quite quick enough to avoid singeing my hair, my eyebrows, and even my eyelashes.

I jumped back, still feeling the heat on my cheeks and nose. I reached up tentatively to inspect the damage. The cheeks seemed okay, the nose stung but was alright. I had heard of people who had completely burned off their eyebrows in the very same way, and I thought right then of what it would be like to go to work naked above the eyes.

I could smell the burnt hair, and when my fingers touched the crusty brows, I really began to believe that I might have done it. I came inside, and cautiously made my way to the bathroom, hoping that I would meet no one on the way. If something really bad had happened, I wanted to be the first to know.

For one second, I paused, full of trepidation about what I might see when I flipped on the light. I couldn't not know, though, and was relieved to see no blistered or hanging skin. There were crinkly, but intact eyebrows, and mostly unharmed eyelashes.

In the end, the steak were fine, the burgers juicy, and despite the lingering acrid scent, all is well.

posted by David @ 9:41 p.m.